9 Persons married people end up having an affair with

Almost everyone who gets married, marries out of love. But why do so many married people end up cheating? It is because they don’t set boundaries. There are nine types of people a married person needs to be aware of and keep boundaries to protect themselves from. Here is how to do it…

1. “The one in need of a hero”

This is where many married men fall prey, they see a young lady, a damsel in distress. They take her in, buy her things, promise to change her life, pay her tuition fees, pay her rent, buy her a car. He feels good because the young lady celebrates and praises him. This is the toughest affair to break because it makes the man feel good as a hero.

Married women also fall prey, especially the successful ones. They get a man in need of support. The man makes her feel good by looking up to her and she keeps supporting him especially financially and giving him her body.

The truth is, many married men and women don’t get appreciated at home. To protect your marriage from being destroyed this way, appreciate each other, make your spouse feel like a hero, look at your spouse in an admiral way. And if out of your good heart one of you identifies someone you’d like to mentor and support, do it together, as a couple. Don’t do philanthropic acts alone, do it as a couple with defined boundaries. Most of all, be a hero at home, to your spouse, your children.

2. “The one with a shoulder to lean on”

This happens when you start running to another person, especially when your marriage is facing issues. You get that one person who is not your spouse you cry to and vent to, you become emotionally attached. Soon, you start meeting up with this person frequently, this person begins to know about your smile, how your day is and what’s on your mind; more than your spouse does. You feel loved, this person feels needed; next thing, you’re having an affair.

To protect your marriage from this, don’t let things deteriorate to the point you cannot vent and cry with each other as husband and wife. Keep good communication channels between the two of you, if there are problems in your marriage talk it out amongst yourselves, not to an an outsider. If that is difficult, then talk to a reputable spiritual leader or a professional counselor or someone of the same gender as you; not someone of the opposite gender who can easilly get close and feelings emerge, distracting you from working on your marriage.

3. “The neighbour”

David, a man after God’s own heart fell this way. He lusted after a neighbour. Watch yourself, so that you don’t fall for that neighbour hanging clothes outside on the line, washing the car, bending while doing house chores, walking in a loose leso with no bra, dressed in shorts or a vest showing muscles. Watch out for that neighbour who comes to visit and gets cosy in your home, that neighbour that is within reach when you are the only one at home.

Protect your marriage from this by only entertaining visitors when you are together, show love to your spouse before your neighbours, have a healthy sex life that you have no time looking out the window, telling off a neighbour who is checking you out.

4. “The work mate”

You are married, perhaps you spend more hours at work than at home; Monday to Saturday, 8am to 5pm, or even night shifts. By the time you get home, you spend about three hours with family before sleeping. Even when you do spend time, it is largely talking about responsibilities of the home as you do chores, eat and sleep. This kind of work schedule can easily push you closer to a work colleague and away from your spouse. Breeding ground for an affair.

Protect your marriage from this by putting your marriage out there. Wear your wedding ring with pride, constantly bring your partner in the middle of conversations at work, “My spouse was telling me that…” During lunch break, call your spouse on phone, or better yet, meet your spouse for lunch. Introduce your spouse to the colleagues you work with the most. Keep a photo of your family/spouse in your office and as your phone’s wallpaper. Above all, make time for your spouse, even as you work so hard.

5. “The friend who is too close”

Some easily fall for this because it is difficult to see it coming. You justify spending time with that friend because you’ve known each other from back in the day. You get too comfortable with this friend, it could be your spouse’s friend. You don’t stop the closeness because friendships are a good thing. Soon, you are kissing, having sex with this friend.

Protect your marriage from this by knowing that once you get married, friendships have to be clearly defined. You are now accountable to your spouse, all other friendships come after your marriage in priority and value. Let your friends know you are taken, have boundaries. Introduce your friends to each other, avoid meeting friends of the opposite gender in private venues, keep no secrets from your spouse.

6. “The attractive stranger”

This is that person some meet in a club when drunk, or that repair man who comes to fix something at home when you are home alone. It could that stranger you bump into in your work travels or when outside the country. You might feel a thrill talking with this new person since your spouse is old news, you’ve known pretty much everything about your spouse.

Protect your marriage from this by growing up. Only a fool would abandon a marriage that has stood for years for a complete stranger. Anything exciting you wish to do with a stranger, go do it with your spouse. Spice up your marriage, avoid alcohol and places of casual interactions.

7. “The old flame”

This could be your ex, the man/woman you had a child with but broke up, someone you used to like, or you had sex with in the past. This person appears and a weak spouse gets confused. The old feelings resurface and regrettable sex occurs.

Protect your marriage by opening up about your past to your spouse. Let your spouse know your ex/s and what led to the break up/s. Tell your spouse when someone from the past makes contact. Tell off an old flame that tries to woo you, stand up for your marriage. Don’t be the weak link that makes your marriage break yet the past should remain in the past

8. “The chat mate”

In this age of social media, many married people are sexting and having phone sex with chat mates. They are excited about going on phone to have naughty sessions with chat mates that they put no effort in their marriage. This is already wrong and it upgrades to a physical meeting with the chat mate to have sexual intercourse, the chat mate turns you on and you want the real sexual experience.

Protect your marriage from this by having phone sex and sexting with your spouse, not a chat mate. Use the phone to better your communication and sex life with your spouse, not to form wrong connections. Ask yourself, if you are really mature and serious about your marriage, will you be comfortable and proud if your spouse goes through your phone conversations?

9. “The househelp”

This is that employed adult who gets to live in your house or who frequents your house to help out. Many men have ended up having sex with a househelp, some married women have also had affairs with the shamba boy or a helper at home. This brings shame upon your home and to your spouse. How dare you have sex with an employee in the home you build with your spouse.

Protect your marriage from this by hiring a house help as a team. Hire someone of good repute. Have rules to follow that you agree together as a couple. Wife, involve your husband in making the rules as often, when a husband is absent in rule making, he ends up over-riding the rules the wife gives. Rules like dress code, no access to the master bedroom, do’s and don’ts. Be loving in the presence of the househelp. Be a team.

Don’t entertain temptations. Make boundaries married man, married woman

Do you expect your partner to be a mind reader?

How many times have you personally felt in your relationship that you were expected to be a mind reader? …

How many times have you personally felt in your relationship that you were expected to be a mind reader?

You were expected to just know what the other person was thinking or feeling, or know what you (according to the other person) have done wrong.

It’s easy to start thinking that your partner is playing mind games and is just being vindictive

After all, they surely know that you can’t read their minds? Come on, they can’t read yours, so how can you be expected to read theirs?

I challenge you, for the sake of your relationship, to consider that this isn’t the case after all. Think about it for a second: when you know something is true, when something is very obvious to you, you assume that it is so for everyone else.

This is why other people’s behaviour bothers you so much. We tend to think that everyone shares our beliefs, and has their moral compasses set the same way as ours, so when someone behaves in a way that you wouldn’t, you feel offended. Surely they know better? They don’t. If they did they wouldn’t behave that way, and who says what is better?

We tend to think that everyone shares our beliefs, and has their moral compasses set the same way as ours, so when someone behaves in a way that you wouldn’t, you feel offended

So now think about your partner in those moments when they get upset over something YOU did, and expect you to know what it is that you have done wrong.

They are falling into the very same trap that you fall into on a regular basis. Now you know that they probably aren’t playing mind games and really do believe that you know exactly what they are thinking. Let them off the hook.

How do you deal with this though?

Most people just attack the other person and it becomes one of many fights. You won’t like the answer, but it is the way forward.

In that moment when you feel like attacking, take one for the team. Wait until cooler heads can prevail, and then when the moment has passed you can discuss it CALMLY and RATIONALLY.

Don’t think you can deal with it in the heat of the moment: no one ever thinks straight in the middle of a furnace.

Important traits of successful daters

by Carly Spindel

These are tips straight from a matchmaker and of course they’re fabulous …

You deserve only the best!

Dating has its ups and downs, but it’s important to remember why you’re out there in the first place: You want to be spending time with someone who will give you what you want, because after all, there’s no use going after something that’s not right for you.

So, what’s the most important thing to remember while you’re out there sharing meals and drinks with new guys every week in the search for love? Stay true to yourself. If you’re not exactly sure what that means or how to do it, read on.

These are tips straight from a matchmaker and of course they’re fabulous…

Love the one you want

If you want to date a tall, dark, and handsome mysterious guy, no one can stop you. If you want to meet a guy with a motorcycle, or an elementary school teacher (or one who’s both) you know what you’re attracted to and who will be good for you in the end. Don’t fight it.

Trying to convince yourself that the perfect person on paper is right for you, when that’s not who you’re innately attracted to, will only lead you down the wrong path in the end.

Don’t ‘settle’

Don’t put too much effort into a guy if you know in the end he’s not going to make you happy. Be true to yourself and who you want to date. If you want a boyfriend but you’re hanging out with a guy who can’t commit, don’t go out with him again. It’s a waste of your time and his …

You can’t change a man

It’s not just men who love a challenge. Ladies, if you meet a guy who says he doesn’t want a girlfriend, listen to him. Don’t make him into your pet project.

Go after someone who wants to be your boyfriend, not a guy who tells you clearly he does not…

Have confidence

When you realise you’re fabulous, other people will too. When you appreciate yourself, other people will appreciate you.

Dating is only fun if you realise how great you are!

Don’t forget that you’re a catch and you should be with a guy who is chasing after you.

Be yourself

When some women meet a man they like, they turn into the girl of his dreams. This isn’t healthy. Instead of turning into an actress, you should be with the man of your dreams. Besides, regardless of how good your acting skills are, your true self will come out eventually. So remember that honesty is the best policy and you deserve to be with any man you want.

Common dating mistakes to avoid (and rules to live by)

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Dating dos and don’ts to live by

When you’re dating, you have to put yourself out there until you find Mr. Right. Sometimes it takes a while, but in the end it’s worth it.

Here are the dating rules to live by, from a matchmaker, so that you don’t make the common dating mistakes.

The dos (these are the things you should be doing)

1. Ask away

The best way to get to know a man is to ask him a ton of questions. Don’t make the date feel like an interview, but get to know him. Believe me, everyone loves to talk about themselves.

2. Dress up

Putting yourself together is important – all the time. I’m a huge fan of leggings and T-shirts. If you ever run into me during the day, I am likely to be in spandex and some kind of comfy top, but that’s not what I wear on dates. I save my comfy clothes for when I hang out with my girlfriends. You should too.

When you’re going on a date, play dress-up with yourself. Wear clothes that make you feel like a million dollars.

3. Be confident

Confidence, confidence, confidence. Say it over and over again and remember how important it is. Men usually want to date a woman who’s sure of herself. They don’t generally want to date an insecure girl who’s always in doubt.

4. Be honest about your feelings

Life is too short to keep your feelings a secret. If you like someone, make him aware of it.

5. Be informed

Many men are attracted to smart, sophisticated women. They like dating women who can bring something to the table. You don’t need to be a rocket scientist, but you should be aware of what’s going on in the world.

The don’ts (the don’ts of dating are the things you should never do … they’re easy to remember!)

1. Don’t be a wimp

No one likes wimps. At least I know I don’t. Most people say you should hide your feelings when you’re casually dating. That rule is so passé. When you’re dating someone, stand up for what you want. If you don’t, no one else will.

2. Easy doesn’t always do it

Everyone likes sex; sex is fun! But that doesn’t mean that you should go around having sex with 40 different guys. You should wait to sleep with someone until you’re exclusively dating.

Men like a chase. They don’t want to date a girl who’s easy…

3. Be game free

Regardless of what your friends tell you, games aren’t cool. They’re for people who are afraid to be vulnerable and show their true colours. Do you want to be that girl? I didn’t think so. So don’t play games.

4. Bye-bye neediness

Men want a woman who’s attentive, but there’s a difference between being attentive and being needy. When you’re attentive, you give a guy the right amount of attention without smothering him, but when you’re needy he’ll generally want to run in the opposite direction as soon as possible. So whatever you do, don’t be needy!

Now that you know a few of the simple dos and don’ts of dating, follow them!

How women are often their own worst enemy

Shot of a young couple having relationship problems at home

1. They depend on a man to tell them they are beautiful in order to see themselves as beautiful. A man should confirm what you already know- you are beautiful.

2. They allow themselves to have unprotected sex with a man they don’t know well or a man not serious about a future with them then suffer when that irresponsible man leaves them pregnant.

3. They sometimes overthink issues leading to unwanted stress.

4. They listen to so many voices that they forget to hear their own voice and the words of truth and wisdom.

5. They stop believing in love when the wrong men they gave themselves to hurt them. Love was not on the wrong, it was your choice that was wrong. Don’t let a wrong choice keep you from love.

6. They steal another woman’s man/husband yet foolishly hope that man will be loyal to them.

7. In order to make people happy or fit in society they forget about themselves.

8. Her man is cheating on her, beating her and insulting her but she makes excuses for him and stays, locking herself in a prison she is too valuable to be in.

9. Allowing a man to silence and kill her dream. Lady, there is more to you than being a wife and mother. God gave you a purpose and dreams too, a man who loves you will support your dreams.

10. Giving the wrong men many chances yet ignoring the man who is good for her.

11. Holding on to insults, ridicule and negative words said to her making her heart heavy. Lady, why have a bank for toxic words spoken to you, why are you helping your enemies to beat you down?

12. Staying in relationships and environments that damage her self-esteem.

13. Allowing the media to tell her who a good man for her is, making her too superficial to even notice love when it comes her way.

14. Using her own poisonous tongue and bitter personality to ruin her own marriage.

15. Getting a good man but running away from him because all her life she has been told she doesn’t deserve the best.

16. Wasting her months crying over a relationship that rightfully ended instead of moving on.

17. Jumping into conclusions and acting irrationally, instead of keeping calm and seeking out the facts then act. Many women push their good men away this way.

18. Wanting to get married and have a great family yet wasting her time dating playful immature men who are not husband material.

19. Baby sitting her pity and problems looking for sympathy, circling around the same problem, a victim of circumstances; instead of taking charge of her life.

20. Being selfish, cold and mean; yet she wonders why friends and men avoid her.

21. Climbing up the ladder of success by sleeping with powerful men instead of using her brilliant mind and hard work; yet she wonders why people use her and don’t respect her.

22. Failing to live by the same wise advise she gives to other women.

How having a low self-esteem affects you!

1. “It makes you put up with crap”

You are in a relationship/marriage where you are being beaten up, insulted, destroyed and cheated on; but you stay. Even worse, when your partner is to blame, you actually think you are the problem and should count yourself lucky for the rotten love you have.

2. “It makes people use you”

People walk all over you, manipulate you and use you because you let them.

3. “It robs you of your identity.”

You follow trends and passing fads because you want to fit in. You suppress your voice because you feel it is not good enough.

4. “It makes you see God as a ruthless punisher”

You feel God is ever with a whip, waiting for you to fail and punish you. God is gracious, loving, forgiving but your low self-esteem keeps you from seeing that. You focus on your mistakes.

5. “It makes you hate being alone”

You dislike your own company because you don’t find yourself attractive. You depend on other people to give you meaning making you clingy. You jump from one relationship to another, one rebound to another to give you worth.

6. “It makes you attention seeking”

You want attention because it consoles you. You speak with a loud voice, create drama, create scenes, dress provocatively, post updates on social media to attract curiosity. You seek pity from people. Without attention you feel worthless.

7. “It makes you settle for less”

You deserve the best but you settle for less. You hold on to an average job, an average life, an average relationship. You feel the best things in life are for the ‘other’ people. A good person wants to love you but you decline, choosing instead to commit to someone who messes up your life.

8. “It makes you a hater”

If you are hating on someone’s success, you have a low self esteem.

9. “It makes you desperate”

You rush things, making everything an emergency therefore ruining even the best of things. You come across as emotionally unstable.

10. “It makes you suicidal”

You give up on life. Better death than living your miserable life. You refuse to take charge of your life despite the many real stories of people who got themselves out of a tough situation. You give up too easily, failing to see your potential and bright future.

11. “It makes you idolize ‘great people”

Beyond admiring people who have been successful, you idolize them. Failing to recognize that they are human just like you, you too can be successful.

12. “It makes you an addict, you are not in control”

Alcohol addiction, pornography addiction, getting high addiction. You hide and numb your reality in addiction. You can’t have fun or be confident without alcohol, you don’t engage in real relationships so you turn to pornography to make you feel alright.

13. “It robs you your smile”

You don’t enjoy your life, your smile is plastic, your laugh is fake. You pretend you are happy but deep down you feel empty.

14. “It makes you insecure and over possessive”

You are fearful of losing your lover because you think there is someone out there better than you. And so for no reason, you suspect your lover, become jealous and want to track your lover’s every move.

15. “It makes you not enjoy sex”

A low self-esteemed man will not heat a woman fully and a low self-esteemed woman will be too self-conscious making the act rigid.To have great sex, one must feel hot and sexy, relax and release.

16. “It makes you see yourself as dirty and good for nothing”

If people insult you or talk negatively about you, if you were sexually abused in the past; all your life, you live feeling unattractive. You let other people and past events define you.

17. “It cheapens you”

You have no dignity, no values. You are casual with sex, having sex to get and keep someone, using sex to feel needed.

18. “It ruins your relationship/marriage”

Low self-esteem will take a toll on your love-life, it will make it a struggle to love you because you don’t love yourself. Your partner can’t make you love yourself, how you view yourself is your sole responsibility.

19. “It keeps you from doing great things”

It makes you mediocre, you become your own worst enemy.

20. “It makes you irrational”

You become easily tossed about, you lack the guts to be decisive and stand by your decisions.

21. “It robs you your life”

You look back over your life and wonder, what have I really done with my life that is meaningful? You lack drive.

22. “It makes you anti-social”

You avoid people because you think if they get close they’ll find out you are not all that amazing. And even if you have a lover, your whole life revolves around that lover, you make no friends and don’t want your lover to have friends. You suffocate your lover.

23. “It makes you avoid your breakthrough”

Yes you have big dreams, yes you can make it; the world is ready for you to shine but you refuse to show up. You talk big but do little. You put no effort, you are scared of risks and failure, you tell yourself it is impossible.

24. “It makes you superficial”

You don’t get to connect with people on a heart level, you cover up on the outside with fine clothes, money, material things because you fear being vulnerable.

Five Things You Can Do as a Couple Instead of Binge Watching TV Shows

Talk!

Instead of spending an entire day in silence with your eyes glued to the TV, switch off that television and engage in actual conversation. Talk about each other’s dreams, interests, inspirations and goals. You’d be surprised how much you’d learn about each other.

Get creative in the Kitchen

Couples who cook together stay together! Studies have shown that cooking together is one of the top activities that couples can do to actually strengthen their relationship. In most cases, it’s not about the level of skill but about spending quality time together. Get creative in the kitchen, cook a meal, bake cupcakes or make cocktails, communicate with each other if at all you want to get anything done and  enjoy the meal together.

Do something together outdoors

This does not have to be as complex as you imagine. Go for a walk, fishing, hiking or bike riding together. Not only do you get to enjoy some fresh air, but you get to encourage each other while you’re out with nature and this builds a healthier relationship.

Explore and Travel

You can start by visiting a town or city close to you that both of you have been eyeing. Try out new places, restaurants and make memories that you will cherish forever.

Play board games

Studies has found that playing board games and creating art with your significant other releases oxytocin, the love hormone. You have to admit that games can get extremely heated and while you argue over whether the last move made by one partner is even legal, you get to communicate and learn about each other which strengthens the relationship.

Find board games that both of you can enjoy, take a painting or pottery class together. The options are endless

How Narcissism Affects All Your Relationships

Are you a narcissist?

Narcissism is when you have an inflated sense of self-importance. This makes you excessively need and demand admiration, have a sense of entitlement, disregard other people’s feelings and makes you unable to handle any criticism.

Narcissism is an acquired disorder stemming out of:

1. Heavy pampering during childhood

2. Societal prejudice such as patriarchy which elevates the man above the woman

3. Unhealthy sexualisation where sex is seen as a force to dominate

4. Lack of self identity, leading to dependency on physical manifestation of success such as money, property and awards

5. Rough childhood where one felt rejected making one vengeful towards others especially when one finds self-made success and want to brag about to others

6. As a reaction to bullying. Some who got bullied strive to display a sense of power and importance to compensate for the past pain

Narcissism makes it difficult to relate with…

1. GOD

A narcissist sees himself/herself as the ultimate; struggling to cede power to the Supreme Being and yet a relationship with God requires humility. A narcissist struggles to repent or trust in a Higher Power as this shows weakness. Some narcissists however use the praise they get in the religious circle to amplify their importance and tend to look down on others who are not worth their “spiritual” greatness

2. YOUR SPOUSE/PARTNER

Marriage is a union that requires interdependence, forgiveness, teamwork, willingness to learn, acceptance of ones weaknesses, celebration of your spouse’s strengths, selflessness and understanding. A narcissist struggles with these, choosing instead to win all arguments, prove they are better, see the wrong in the spouse but not in self and act like doing something good is a favour. A narcissist will proudly emphasize how better educated, better cultured, richer, better behaved, a better parent he/she is than the spouse. If the spouse doesn’t notice this self-importance, a narcissist can easily turn violent or emotionally and financially abusive to demand respect and admiration

3. POTENTIAL PARTNER

A Narcissist will struggle in the dating scene wondering why people don’t notice their accomplishments. Many repel dating narcissists because they make it all about them, they keep bragging about their accomplishments, they are rude to waiters, they feel entitled to other people’s body and time, they are too forward wondering why anyone would say no to them, they put down others, they insist on things being done their way because they think they are better

4. CHILDREN

Narcissists struggle to make a connection with their children, they belittle their children or demand their children to be like them. Parenthood requires one to come down to the child’s level to communicate but a narcissist sees this as beneath him/her thus breeding misunderstanding, pushing the child away. Some instead of being loving to their children, they use their children for social recognition

5. THE OPPOSITE GENDER

A narcissist tends to look down on the opposite gender seeing that gender as inferior. This hampers healthy gender relations. When you see the other gender as inferior, you fail to demonstrate respect and you use the other gender to your advantage

6. FRIENDS

Narcissists tend not to have true genuine friends because they come off as manipulative, controlling, self-centred, egotistical and insensitive. What they do have are either fake friends out to use them, or people who stay close to them because of their money, fame and benefits

7. COLLEAGUES

A narcissist is difficult to work with, putting down others and only seeing their own opinion and contribution. A narcissist starts unnecessary wars, plays the victim when things don’t go their way, abandons the team when things go wrong and wants all the credit when things go well

8. JUNIORS

A narcissist is difficult to work for. As a boss, a narcissist will crash other people’s ideas and do harsh things just to remind others who is in charge

If you are a narcissist, do something about it.

~ Audit your life, why do you act the way you do?

~ Deal with your past hurt if any

~ Stop hiding behind your accomplishments and money and ask yourself how do you treat people?

~ Accept your weaknesses and the strengths of others

~ Humble yourself to pray and meditate as this will teach you to be vulnerable

~ Each day, touch the life of at least one person without expecting recognition in return.

~ Express your love and appreciation for others. Learn to give compliments

~ Let the reality of death remind you that you have a limited time to relate with others. Make it count

~ Seek counselling to better and holistically understand yourself

Why Being In Love is Good For Your Health

1. People who feel loved worry less.

2. People who feel loved smile more and laugh more in a genuine way.

3. People who feel loved are more productive because they feel inspired.

4. People who feel loved are excited about the future because they are safe in another person’s heart.

5. People who feel loved feel intensely sexy because there is someone special who notices them.

6. People who feel loved have more fun.

7. People who feel loved don’t turn to drugs and addiction, there is no reason to escape.

8. People who feel loved better themselves to love better.

9. People who feel loved recover quickly from a painful past because they feel accepted.

10. People who feel loved heal faster because they have more to live for.

11. Children who feel loved turn into great adults because they easily submit to direction and correction.

LOVE IS GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH!

How to introduce your partner to the people in your life

1. Introduce the one you love to your parents. That is your role, your partner cannot introduce himself/herself. This shows you take pride in your lovelife and you two are serious about each other.

2. If you two are married, don’t introduce your spouse by the parental role but by the marital role. Don’t say this is “Baba Ndonye” or “Mama Aviv” or “Mama wa kwangu”; instead, say “This is my wife/husband”. It is important to affirm each other as husband and wife even when the child/children come. Your first position to each other is husband and wife, out of that position comes children.

3. When introducing your partner to someone/people and you two are standing next to each other, give physical contact. Man, hold her by her waist; woman hold his arm or touch his back. It demonstrates ownership and closeness.

4. When you are about to give a speech in public and your partner is present; acknowledge your partner’s presence. Let your partner wave or do something. Even if your partner is shy, this goes a long way to showing unity and public confidence in your love.

5. If you are a single parent and you are falling in love; properly introduce the one you love to your child/children with love and warmth. Let your child/children you love that person. Your child/children will treat the one you love depending on the nature of the introduction.

6. Whenever someone makes a move on you face to face or via chat and you are taken/married, introduce your partner in the conversation even when not asked if you are taken/married. Let that person know you have a man/woman/husband/wife.

7. When introducing your partner to your friends, add some colour and sugar. Say something like “This is my man, my King. The one who treats me so well” or “This is my wife, Mrs. ______. The Queen of my castle” This makes your partner feel loved and appreciated. Learn to brag a little about the one you love.

How much value you place on your relationship/marriage, is seen by how you two introduce each other to people.